Virtual Coffee Date – January 2017

latte

Have a seat friends and refill that cup of coffee or glass of wine, depending on the hour, as it is time for a virtual date. A lot has transpired since our last date together. In fact, I feel as if the past few months have been a whirlwind and a blur, leaving us both a bit exhausted but very happy.  It’s incredible to reflect on how much has changed in just eight months. The home office we only finished designing a year ago is already starting to evolve into our nursery. The rest of our home has transformed into a cozy, though sometimes drafty, space where I can envision our life for at least the next few years.  I have a lot to share with you all tonight, so here goes.

  • If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that this weekend I overhauled my dresser drawers in search of more space. This search led me to discover that my workout clothes were taking up five drawers in my dresser, even though only six or seven of those pieces currently fit. I am storing all my workout clothing in a basket above our closet, but definitely need to get a few pieces especially a few more long sleeve workout tops.
  • If we were sitting together today, I would tell you that per the recommendation of so many people, Bo and I are trying to build weekly date nights into our routine as well as time to connect with friends.  I am doing my best to ensure I am able to remain present and not overwhelmed by these social commitments by only planning 1-2 per week instead of trying to pack a month’s worth into one week.
  • If we were sitting together today, I’d insist that you add two books to your reading list. Last year I read 31 books and have no doubt that this year I will reach my goal of reading at least 52 books, especially when I think of all those hours of breastfeeding that await me come June. However, two of the books I finished in January, still run through my mind each day more than any other book I read last year – It Ends With Us and All The Light We Cannot See. Though very different books, both evoked emotions and thoughts about difficult subjects in the most beautiful and touching ways. What’s the best book you read recently? 
  • If we were sitting together today, my face would get red as I admitted to you that last week, Bo and I found ourselves either eating out or eating delivery food every night. A combination of poor planning, evening commitments and work caused this but I don’t want it to become a habit. Years ago, when we lived in Gramercy, we survived on Seamless, ordering salads, sushi or Greek almost nightly. I pinned a few recipes that I’m hoping to prep ahead on Sunday so we can have a week worth of home cooked meals next week. This week we are already on the right track as a chicken is roasting in the oven right now.
  • If we were sitting together today, I would confide in you that I already have mom guilt and I haven’t even given birth. I always thought that Bo and I would capture each week of pregnancy, using the blocks our friends gave us to keep a timeline of the journey. Unfortunately, I haven’t taken a picture with the blocks in almost three weeks. This makes me sad as I know that I will want to look back on this pregnancy and remember all the milestones. Here’s hoping we can get better for the next 22 weeks.
  • If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you how surprised I am to enjoy my new work setup. I’ve recently started working from my company’s WeWork location in the Union Square area two to three days per week and am surprisingly enjoying the change of pace. I thought I would miss my work from home routine but instead have found that I thrive on the camaraderie, enjoy catching up with other friends who work in the area over breakfast or dinner dates and now value my work from home days even more.
  • If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you how excited I am about my upcoming trip to Des Moines, Iowa. Four of my college girlfriends are coming together for the first time in ages to enjoy a weekend of relaxation, catch up and fun together while also discovering our friend’s new city.
  • If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that I am so thankful for the Snoogle pregnancy pillow. I am borrowing my friend Amanda’s and thanks to that huge, awkward shaped pillow, after two weeks of restless, uncomfortable sleep, I slept wonderfully last night and didn’t wake up with back pain this morning.
  • If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that I just ordered a maternity swimsuit for lap swimming. Now that our membership to the YMCA provides us access to a large, beautiful indoor pool I have no excuse not to hop back in the pool. Many of my friends have raved that it helped them stay healthy throughout pregnancy and after giving birth, so even though the idea of getting in a bathing suit isn’t exciting, I’m going to dive in this weekend.

Your turn: What would you share with me? 

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19 Comments

  1. Katie January 18, 2017 / 1:18 am

    I’m starting the nightingale, and very excited. I loved all the light we cannot see. I don’t know if pregnancy emotions would bode well with “the light between oceans” but I liked the book and will probably see the movie when it comes out.

    • ashleyd January 18, 2017 / 2:28 pm

      Yeah, I think I’ll wait until after pregnancy to read that as a few others have said the same thing 🙂

  2. Dee Dee Carr January 18, 2017 / 1:50 am

    Love this! Loved All the Light You Cannot See. And I just started Nightingale.

    So great that you guys are doing weekly date nights. Try to keep them up after the baby is born. I remember an older friend of mine telling me the best thing she did for her marriage/family/herself was have a standing date night sitter available. Some nights you two might be running errands – but you will look forward to those nights.

    • ashleyd January 18, 2017 / 2:28 pm

      Thanks for the recommendations! Yes, a friend told me to find a Friday night sitter and never let her go – keep her on a weekly basis as some weeks you may want to run errands or do things like get haircut, etc and other times it’ll be a date night.

  3. Lindsay January 18, 2017 / 2:15 am

    I would share with you that I live in Des Moines! I’m a native and have been reading your blog for a few months. Let me know if you want any recs. I love this city and I think you’ll enjoy it too

    • ashleyd January 18, 2017 / 2:27 pm

      Thanks Lindsay! That’s so fun! I think our plans are going to be pretty relaxed – hopefully a long walk depending on weather and a workout in addition to some spa time and a few yummy meals.

  4. Katie @ Live Half Full January 18, 2017 / 2:36 am

    Yes to the date nights! It’s hard to get out with a baby, but a lot of people told us to get out while my son was super little since he was pretty easy and we did. I’m glad we did since going out with a toddler is much different!

  5. Mindy @ Just A One Girl Revolution January 18, 2017 / 3:08 am

    LOVED All The Light You Cannot See – slow start, but amazing overall! As for the mom guilt, girl, I have no doubt that you and Bo are going to be amazing parents! Don’t sweat the small stuff.

    • ashleyd January 18, 2017 / 2:26 pm

      Thanks Mindy! 🙂 I really appreciate it!

  6. Beth January 18, 2017 / 1:01 pm

    I loved loved loved all the light. Fantastic. I can’t seem to find any good books recently! I did just re-read The Handmaid’s Tale. A little startling in the current world, but still a fantastic read if you have never read it.

    • ashleyd January 18, 2017 / 2:26 pm

      I’ve never read Handmaid’s Tale but just added it to my Goodreads list – thanks!

  7. emma January 18, 2017 / 9:41 pm

    I’m currently expecting too and have also been trying to capture memories and moments to look back on. I have a journal/scrapbook (actually, Emily Ley’s baby book (I think you’re reading her book?), which I then made up some pregnancy pages and inserted into the binder) to track the weeks and was getting down on myself for not completing it so I thought about how I could make it as easy and approachable as possible. Now I jot down notes in my phone throughout the week and take pictures randomly and then save them into a dedicated Pregnancy album on my phone. Then every few weeks I get things printed and write them into the baby book. I found the weekly expectation was draining the fun, but by making it easy, or taking the pressure off the “picture perfect” photos (they’re just for us to look back on anyway!) it’s been much easier to keep up with. When in doubt I give myself compassion and think about how to take the stress off it. Hope it helps!

    • ashleyd January 19, 2017 / 2:58 pm

      I will have to look that scrapbook/journal up Emma as I’d love a place to put my sonograms etc.

  8. Jesica @rUnladylike January 18, 2017 / 10:13 pm

    If you liked All the Light We Cannot See, check out Sarah’s Key and Nightingale. Sarah’s Key was probably my favorite book I read in 2016. I also liked What Alice Forgot.

    Love this idea of a coffee date and all the things you’re feeling right now. I always wished I had swam during pregnancy as I heard it is amazing. Love how active you continue to be. xoxo

    • ashleyd January 19, 2017 / 2:57 pm

      I read Nightingale and ABSOLUTELY loved it! Sarah’s Key will have to go on my list to read next. 🙂 Thanks!

  9. dixya @food, pleasure, and health January 19, 2017 / 12:41 am

    if we were having coffee today, i’d tell you that i could certainly use a change of pace at my job..

    • ashleyd January 19, 2017 / 2:57 pm

      Sorry to hear that Dixya – I hope you’re able to find something to shake things up at work.

  10. Kate January 19, 2017 / 12:40 pm

    I had my first baby this past June and didn’t keep any records during pregnancy and I very much regret that! The first time I felt her kick was incredible but I can’t even remember the date now!

    I had so many books lined up to read whilst on leave, I’ve read half of one! You are either too busy dealing with the baby and doing baby chores that the time you have to yourself you either want to sleep, go to the toilet or shower (that was my order!). I admire women that can multitask while feeding but I wasn’t able to. I learnt the hard way not to beat yourself up about not doing things you think you should.

    • ashleyd January 19, 2017 / 2:56 pm

      Haha! See Kate more reason I want to do a better job keeping track of things. I think I’m going to start jotting things in my phone since I always have it and can do that on the subway, etc. Interesting what you say about multitasking when feeding as so many of my friends have said that reading helped calm them while feeding – we’ll see what works for me though. 🙂

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