Embracing A Time of Transition

Last night I opened up my heart to my Instagram and Facebook followers. This morning, I realized that it only makes sense to share this same story on my blog as I can’t assume that everyone who reads my blog also follows me on my social media channels or is able to keep up with posts thanks to the lovely and often annoying Facebook and Instagram algorithms.  The words of wisdom, feedback and comments I received on Instagram and Facebook gave me so much hope this morning as I started this fresh, new day. Perspective can come in all shapes, sizes and forms. Yesterday this perspective came to me in two forms and helped me balance the emotions that I’ve been feeling lately.

  • Hearing our Baby Girl’s heartbeat and seeing her wave to us during our 36 week sonogram as we learned that she is approxiamately 5 lbs 11 oz and is healthy and happy.
  • Receiving words of wisdom and advice from so many friends and readers, many of whom have never commented previously, providing guidance during this time of transition.

While I realize the below is perfectly normal for a person to feel during this time of transition, here are the feelings that have been weighing on my heart and soul recently as I have opened up my blog or social media platforms to post.

I have a lot on my mind tonight friends. Recently I’ve felt as if I’m at a crossroads.  I still think of myself as a health and wellness blogger who loves to inspire others to lead a healthier life through a balanced love of food, wine, workouts and travel.  But, as June 18th approaches, I feel more like a MOM and as if I’m approaching the beginning of a new chapter.

A few readers have reached out about my new blog header, saying that I’m claiming to be a mom before my child arrives. Others have asked how I can claim to be a runner, even though I havent run in months. Trust me, I’m living this identity crisis. Since September, I’ve been focused on providing a supportive, nurturing environment for our baby to grow ans thrive, so yes, I do feel like a mom already.

I find myself over-thinking every post, wonderinf if I’m isolating those of you who aren’t moms or not inspiring my runner and fitness friends in the way they once loved.

I don’t want to find myself in a place where I dread social media and worry about everything I write and say because then I wont be sharing my FULL self.  Instead, I’m going to say that if you want to join me on the ride to see what the next few months and years hold, I hope you’ll stick around and keep engaging. I won’t make any promises, except to post on here and the blog more often, and do my best to continue to inspire YOU ALL, regardless of where you are in your life.

As always, please feel free to share your thoughts, advice and two cents with me! I read and value every comment and opinion

Photo credit Alexis Mera Damen

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International Women’s Day

 

Good morning! Today we are going to change gears a bit. I had a post planned which shared some of my travel essentials that are packed in my carry-on bag and stowed above my head during today’s flight from New York to San Francisco.

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But then, as I read Grace’s post, I was inspired to share some thoughts with you all today in honor of International Women’s Day.   I am thankful for the strong women in my family who have shaped and inspired me for over 30 years. These four women are radically different from each other and therefore shaped and molded me in their own way.

    • Mom – My mother worked night shifts as a neonatal nurse in order to have more time with us while we were growing up. Even though she worked four, ten-hour shifts per week she made my brother and I her priority – never missing a chorus performance, awards ceremony or birthday. She proved that a working mother could also be engaged in her family. I realize now, as I grow older, just how much she sacrificed for us during these years as night shift can wreak havoc on one’s body. Her caring and nurturing heart, helped me develop a softer and more loving side when I needed it most.  She also taught me that with hard work, anything was possible.
    • My Aunts – Each of my three aunts, while very different and unique, impacted my childhood by helping me see the world and inspiring me to aspire for my dreams. My Aunt Rusty worked in one of the largest investment banks in New York City back in the 1980s when women were rarely seen in this environment. She stood up for her beliefs and rights as a female, exposing me to the trials and tribulations females faced in the professional world. Within our family, my Aunt Annamay is the woman who is impassioned to support those who were born with less. Years of teaching English as a second language in an Arizona border town has allowed her to share with me and my family the difficulties so many people face each day and remind us how much we have in our lives. My Aunt Linda inspired me with her passion for shaping children’s lives as a school principal.

I am not sure whether it is because of the recent press or the fact that I am currently carrying a tiny baby girl who will enter the world in June, but this year more than ever, women’s empowerment has been on my mind. I’ve had many discussions with friends, family, and co-workers about this topic over the past four months.  The wonderful thing about these discussions is that I have learned something from each of them. Living in New York City has provided me with the opportunity to become close with friends and colleagues who are very different than me.  I love that these differences mean that our views often do not align, nor do the way we share our views with the world. But, this difference in opinion, has also inspired me.

I shared, via an email with a relative recently, that I personally don’t believe that marches, boycotts and countless phone calls to government officials, is the only way to show support for today’s women.  I firmly believe that we can each take action in ways that are just as unique as each us. So while I may not have images of me at one of the many Women’s Marches on my social media feed, I thought today was a perfect day to share my thoughts on a few ways any woman can be a strong woman in today’s world while supporting others. 

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Invest in the future by mentoring young women. This year I have made the decision to invest time mentoring women both personally and professionally. Through my alma mater, The University of Georgia, and my company, Procter & Gamble, I have had the opportunity to work with four incredible women as they forge their paths into the workforce.

Focus on supporting women versus competing with them. I learned a long time ago, that the comparison trap is an evil place to live. Regardless how hard you work to climb the professional ladder, how much you train or how many different filters you layer in Instagram; within moments someone will come along who is climbs faster, gets results faster or receives more likes and engagement. It is easy to fall prey to the numbers game and spend hours comparing yourself but over the past year,  I have found that I gain much more by supporting women. Sometimes this means finding happiness for that friend who is promoted faster, celebrating a friend’s half marathon PR after you have a horrible race or sending a quick note to someone who needs it most.  

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Find your support network and nurture it. Over the past year, as I’ve come in contact with women who feel toxic or don’t support other women, I do my best to create a distance. Whether it is unfollowing them on social media, disassociating with them in the workplace or not meeting with them again, I believe that we are responsible for doing our best to surround ourselves with people who inspire and support us. Some people call this their tribe or girl gang. Whatever the word, find the network of women who uplift you most. I am so thankful to have seven women, whom I call mentors or friends, within my company that inspire me on a daily basis. These women have advocated on my behalf, helped me navigate through office politics and been there to high five and celebrate the wins over the years. Though they live across the country, they have proven multiple times that they are just a phone call, email or text message away. Depending on the size of your company or office, it may be difficult to find many women but even one can make a difference. Once you find them, make sure to nurture the relationship by ensuring it is a two-way street.  In my personal life,  I have realized that my friend groups and circles have evolved over the years due in part to our time abroad as well as changing life stages. While giving my friend addresses for baby shower invites, I realized that there are women in my life now that have made a huge impact in a short time while others have unfortunately fallen out of the circle. While I don’t harbor negative feelings towards those that I’m no longer close with, I have made a conscious effort to nurture the friendships that are most important to me at this point in my life. This year that has meant traveling to Iowa to see dear college friends, connecting via email, phone, and text with friends who aren’t local and continuing to be the organizer and planner for those that live in New York City.

Remember that your actions speak louder than words. While it is wonderful to advocate for women in ways that are personally meaningful to you, remember that it is not what you write on a Facebook post or piece of paper that speaks the loudest. Instead, it is the way you carry yourself and serve as a role model 365 days a year.  Wherever you are, there is someone watching you and she could be an easily influenced teenager or a lost 30-year-old. Just because something isn’t shared on social media doesn’t mean it didn’t happen or come out of your mouth. Let us learn from example and choose our words and actions wisely.

I only hope that my daughter has the opportunity to see and experience the world from a similar vantage point that I did. Realizing from an early age that thanks to the support and hard work by the women who came before her, she can enjoy the right to vote, freedom to choose and equal opportunity school and workplace that allows her to thrive and grow.

I would love to hear your thoughts in honor of International Women’s Day. How do you show your support?

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Virtual Date

Have a seat friends and refill that glass of wine or coffee, depending the hour of day you’re reading this, because it is time for a virtual date. A lot has transpired since our last date together. We are both happily immersed in our new roles and life in Brooklyn.

-If we were together today, I’d tell you that making a 1,600 square foot space feel like a home has been a bigger challenge than either of us imagined. Since we’ve tried to be responsible in decorating the space, we’ve stuck to a monthly budget which means a slower process. It still doesn’t feel complete but we are making progress slowly but surely.

-If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that while we haven’t found ourselves in the ordering or eating out habit, our dinners haven’t been quite what I imagined. I have over 100 recipes pinned which I’m hoping to start making sooner or later, but so far dinner has been a grilled meat, a large salad and roasted vegetable. Between work, workouts and house updates I just haven’t had time.

 

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that lately, weekends with my girlfriends have been quite different as many of them now have little boys or girls in their lives. In Dallas this weekend Blake and I enjoyed lots of quality girl talk, wonderful food, gorgeous weather, and shopping but we were in bed each night by 11 pm and spent some of most treasured time playing on the floor with her daughter. 

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If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that I had the serious urge to chop my long hair into one of the popular “lob” (long bob” styles earlier this week before flying to Dallas. Even though I had a trim just a month ago, it is longer than ever and driving me insane. I love the bangs I have these days but on bad hair days it is unruly and takes longer than ever to blow dry. Any tips?

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that my mom is training for her second half marathon – the Savannah Rock’N’Roll Half marathon which is a month from now. I’m so proud  of her for taking her walking to a new level and choosing to conquer this distance again. This time my aunt will be joining her but my plan is the same – run the half as quickly as possible then rush back to walk the final miles with them.

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that I am not sure what it is about the South but I craved Diet Coke the entire time I was in Dallas. I never caved, instead sipping everything but including a delicious green juice, sparking water, and wine. Going home in November and December, I know that the urge to stop for a big gulp of Diet Coke with chewy ice will be there but I have to remind myself how much healthier I’ve felt since giving it up.

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that over the past few weeks, I donated one to many things to Goodwill. I purged my closet down so much that the only black dress I had for this week’s NEW (Network of Executive Women) meeting was the dress I wore to our engagement dinner seven years ago. I saved it due to the special place it holds in my heart and it’s classic look, but haven’t been able to fit in it for at least six years due to the unforgiving lace bodice and sizing. After months of cleaner eating, it fit like a charm Thursday night.

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If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that one Saturday during college football season, without fail, both my teams lose miserably. Luckily, my gir’ls day in Dallas kept me from watching either game or I know that I would have drowned my sorrows in pumpkin beer. Yesterday was definitely upset Saturday with multiple Top 25 teams being facing defeat.

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that after years of using only a tinted moisturizer, I crossed into the world of foundation yesterday while at Sephora. I’ve found myself using a primer, tinted moisturizer and a powder in order to achieve a more finished look. When my latest tube of Laura Mercier’s Tinted Mousturizer started spurting it’s last drops, I decided to use it as an opportunity to try something different. I just did a quick makeup application in the Dallas airport and loved how smooth and even the coverage of my new Laura Mercier foundation is even without a primer or powder.

If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that traveling this week seemed foreign after three months in New York. I made three novice mistakes – forgetting to pack my liquids separately, over packing for the conference and girls weekend and forgetting to download my book or show for the three-hour plane flight home. It was a great primer for the next six weeks of more frequent travel.

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If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that Vera Bradley reminds me of high school graduation when every girl in our graduating class received an abundance of quilted bags, purses, wallets and id holders before leaving for freshman year. After seeing how handy Amy’s old jewelry roll and hanging toiletry bag were while rooming with her in Dallas, Blake and I made the North Park Mall Vera Bradley our first stop yesterday. I can’t decide what shocked me more – that Blake didn’t know what Vera Bradley was or how expensive the items are these days. Luckily the classic black items will last for ages and be used often.

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If we were sitting together today, I’d tell you that we became aunts and uncles today to an adorable seven week old miniature toy golden doodle. Sully stole our heart today when we held him for the first time and we can’t wait to spoil him rotten!

Your turn: What would you share with me today if we were together?

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